Hi Vicki,

Thought I'd let you know how I'm making out in New Jersey. At first we had a lot of getting used to each other to do. But I've got my mistress pretty well trained now as to my likes and dislikes. Here's a list of what I like that she doesn't and how we each feel about it:


I like going to the park on Saturdays to see all the other dogs, joggers and bikers (and also the ducks, geese, squirrels etc.). I found I can swim in the lake but not good enough to get me a duck or goose dinner. I'm a slow swimmer but on ground I can really travel! She doesn't seem at all impressed by my game bird skills so to please her, I sit like a good dog now (it's hard) and just watch them and she's impressed with my inaction. If she would only let me loose, I just know I can catch us a dinner or two in nothing flat.

Big Game
Last week we went to Virginia and I discovered cows in the field, but for some reason, she wouldn't let me to catch any of them for her (we could have fit at least 2 in the pickup and we could have STEAK and JERKY TREATS every night until spring!) I tell you, these Eastern folks just don't appreciate my talent.

Small Game
She just doesn't know what fun it is to chase things although one night I did corner (without her help) and catch (with her help) an opossum in the yard; she thought it was dead but I knew better - I really upset her - and then after it finished playing possum, she let it get away! Those rawhide strips and doughnuts and balls are okay for puppies, but it's not like what a real genuine hunting dog wants.


Don't Fence Me In
Hey... tell your dogs they can get out of a chain link fence if they go to the corner and climb it with 2 feet on each side of the corner.. it works every time (but now she found out how I do it and now she's got me in the duck pen when I'm out back alone). Ask Claude if he knows how to get out of it, I need some tips on this one.

The Great "out" doors
She especially does not appreciate how fast I can move out of the front door when she opens it... she now handicaps me by making me sit back about 5 feet from the door so she can beat me to it and close it before I get through it - It's not fair. I ask you, how fast does a dog have to be? I don 't think a greyhound could make it past her!

Shop till you drop
One morning I got out (showed her I could still beat her to the door) and I ran to the 7-11 store alone to get my liverwurst; thought I'd help her out with the groceries but she claims they wouldn't give me any because I don't have any money; I tell you, my effort was not appreciated at all. Life here in Trenton sure is strange! She wants to bring home all the bacon and liverwurst too!


Sleeping Arrangements
I can't even sleep on the couch here. I think Karen gave her some sort of "tattle tale" that screeches whenever I get up there. How does she expect me to get a good night's sleep... on the floor? Like a dog?? I thought you'd find me a dog-friendly house that I could run my way.


The only time I know she is pleased with me is when we go for a walk at night, she sometimes acts 'drunk' and bumps into me so I have to stay a little bit away and keep my eye on her to see what she's up to. She calls me a "heal" then she tells me I'm a "good girl", I don't know what she really thinks, it's confusing! I don't think I'm a heal.

I asked her for something nice for Christmas, but Karen told her only good dogs get to pick out their own presents, the rest get a surprise. I wonder what it will be... maybe one of Santa's reindeer to chase? (Probably it will only be those stupid fake antlers that people put on dogs) Ho! Ho! Ho! Please tell her to get me something GOOD - Trick or Treat was in October!
Vicki, thanks a lot for finding me a job when all I really wanted was a home I could run. You sure bombed out this time, don't send any more dogs to New Jersey. They only have a dog's life here; no fun loving dog deserves to work so hard - at least find them someone who 's not so "dog" gone dumb!

Anyhow, she's getting smarter, (she's a lot smarter than when I got here), so I'm doing my job - teaching her how to teach me.



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